Things Jared Wants to Be When He Grows Up

  The doctor who always carries a creepy stuffed animal to work.

₪  The trend spreader of the belt that looks like a thin seatbelt.

₪  The dad who installs an intercom system throughout the house solely so that he can project surprise booty burps to every room and leave the kids shrieking (we went to the Parade of Homes yesterday and this is the idea he got most excited about).

₪  The inventor of lip-shaped chapstick (so you can make out with it when you put it on, duh).

₪  The founder of "AirCruises," a company that flies you around the world on a week-long cruise in the sky. You spend your time in a giant luxury blimp-type-aircraft with glass walls, and you dip down near islands and through grand canyons, enjoying the scenery from your cruise ship in the sky.

₪  German.


  1. Ohhh, now I get why you married him! (:

  2. Ohhh, now I get why you married him! (:

    1. Haha! Oh you know me, he and I are just two peas in a pod :)



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