Hello from another week in moving limbo!
Positives from the week:
1-No one is physically ill at this time...except maybe Jack who appears to be coming down with something, but it hasn't landed yet so I'm going to take this win for one more day and cling to it.
2-My parents continue to feed and shelter us and be the best company, and pick Jack up from school etc etc etc. This would be a muchhhh harder move if I didn't have them in my corner.
3-We are discovering the magic of Utah parks! Yes it is freezing outside. But wow, the parks here are phenomenal, and so prolific. This is especially fabulous to us coming from a town that had exactly one public park, and it was pretty sketchy.
4-We have heat set up in our rental house. We even hosted a little play date with my high school bestie and her kids one afternoon to try and infuse some happy play into our formerly sad, empty, cold space. We're getting there.
5-We were able to attend some get-togethers with family members this week and it just warmed my heart so much. I haven't seen some of my Haines cousins in a decade and we had the loveliest casual potluck of Haineses yesterday. My kids played so well with all the other kids around that, even without Jared there, I was able to eat and chat with long-lost relatives the whole time (ok, I think I am the long-lost relative in this situation). I almost cried from happiness on the drive home.
6-Jared drives home to us tomorrow!!!!
Negatives from the week:
1. Jack is having a really hard time with school right now. He got put in a loud class, and his recess and P.E. hours haven't been what he expected. He's just taking all the changes pretty hard. I'm going to be in touch with his teacher to see what we can do to hopefully make things better going forward, but man. It's borderline impossible to get him to go into his school in the mornings and I feel so sad for him.
2. Jared is going to be driving home to us in the middle of a really bad weather system hitting Washington. And there kind of isn't another option because the entire 10-day forecast for the mountain passes we normally have to drive through show daily blizzards. He is going to go a different, longer route than usual to try and stay safe. Prayers.
3. I got a bad haircut. I'm normally such an overthinker so it's a mystery why I do this, but I have a bad habit of spontaneously deciding I want a dramatic haircut NOW, looking at professional places and realizing I'll have to wait several days and pay a lot of money, and then saying, "Eh, I'll just run down to Great Clips/Fantastic Sams," where I proceed to get a bad haircut every time. I shouldn't say it's a bad haircut. She actually did a pretty good job. It's just a lot shorter than I was expecting. I told her I wanted it grazing my shoulders, but somehow it ended up at my chin with even shorter layers all around. At first I was like, "Ok cute, this isn't so bad. I look like a 90s hot mom." But then nighttime came and I was like, "Oh no, no no no, this is 100% Severus Snape hair." I will say, I don't hate it. It just doesn't feel like me. But alas, as always, it will grow on me (*snicker, snicker*).
We're going to keep with the fish/river blog titles for a while yet. I'm quirky!
It's been another doozy of a week. I expect the doozies of weeks to continue for another month, at least. Moving is just doozy after doozy. This month feels a lot like when we took hit after hit when we first moved to Grenada. At least this time I have family nearby and we're not in a developing country. You guys. I hope I never take for granted not living in a third-world country. That was way harder than this, and this is pretty stinkin hard. Although in all seriousness, having kids this time around makes the playing field pretty equal to moving to a third-world-country sans kids. At least I was well rested then.
I tried to get us moved into our rental house this week. My parents live about 25 minutes away from the school Jack has started attending, while the rental house is a 5 minute walk from the school. So in my head it seemed like a no-brainer to move into the rental. But it was a brainer, and I did not have the brains to make it work. The first strike against moving into the rental house was when I loaded Alice up to get Jack after school one day, in hopes of staying at the rental all afternoon and night. It turns out that an afternoon in an empty house with two young kids, no other adults, no furniture, and no other belongings or toys is . . . a bit depressing. No duh, Laur. It was novel and fun for half an hour and then I started wanting to cry.
Strike two against moving into the rental house was when I realized there was still a large quantity of cat hair in all the carpets from the previous tenants. I am allergic to cat hair. It was not a good time. This is the point at which we bailed from attempting a night at the rental and drove back to my parents'. The next day I went back to the rental house, hoping to at the very least get Alice's crib set up for when we felt ready for another attempt. Unfortunately, the smoke alarm was chirping every minute or two. I adulted up, grabbed some fresh batteries, and did in fact change the batteries in my rental home's smoke detector. Very demure. Until it did nothing. Tried another set of fresh batteries. Nope again. Had my dad come see if he could fix it. Still no. Strike 3, and back to my parents' home. I texted our landlord, feeling kind of dumb. "Hey I don't like cat hair. Also I can't figure out how to turn off a smoke alarm lol!" (that's a paraphrase, not the actual text)
The next morning after I dropped Jack off for school, I once again stopped by the rental. It was frigid. The thermostat read 54 degrees. I tinkered with the thermostat, got some unpacking done for an hour or so, and the heat never turned on. The next day I returned to find the house at 46 degrees. I did not want to feel EXTRA dumb and have to send my landlord another text. "Plz help, I might not know how to use a thermostat and yes I am in my 30s." But I also didn't want the pipes in his house to start freezing and exploding, so after spending some time in the furnace room reading the owner's manual to the furnace with no luck, I let the landlord know that the furnace might be broken and he sent a furnace repair guy over.
This is where it becomes a really *fun* (embarrassing) story. Our landlord is really chill. I cleared the house back out, and he sent over a team of cleaners to scrub the place of all cat hair. He got the smoke alarm replaced and a furnace guy came and took a look. I get a call late Friday evening from my landlord. "Hey, everything looks good at the house. The HVAC guy came and took a look at the furnace. It looks like you just haven't set up your natural gas or power yet." 😳 I was dumbfounded. WHO LET ME TRY AND SET UP AND MOVE INTO A HOME BY MYSELF. WHERE IS THE ADULT HERE. I'm just a little girl. Anyway that was a little awkward. I think I was like, "Hee hee oopsie, sorry!" And then hung up real fast.
Luckily this gave me something to call and cry for Jared do because homeboy needs some homework assignments. He is straight CHILLIN in Washington with his free times and his naps and his gym bro seshes, and his teeny-tiny 18-hours-a-week work schedule, and his staying at a resort with his parents all weekend while I am over here actually physically dying. No sleeps. Illnesses. A presidential election. Too much adulting. Feral children. Can you tell I am bitter. Yes everyone can tell that. Jared will have his work cut out for him when it comes time to pack the moving truck though, and when he gets here I am taking several days to get away and sleep and sleep and sleep. All by myself. Speaking to no one. Doing little to no adulting. It's more exciting than Christmas to me. By far.
Ok that was a lot of writing. Turns out there's a lot to report during a stressful move! I have way more to say but should probably keep it to myself. Me and Alice are still sick. Alice is mostly better but I still feel pretty awful, especially in the evenings. I told Jared that it feels like an emergency situation that I need to get away to catch up on sleep when he gets here. It feels like my body is sending me messages that really bad things are around the corner if I don't start taking care of myself. So. One more doozy of a week, plus a couple days, then Jared gets here and then it's my turn to go take care of myself for a bit. Oh! Can't forget the big news--we got an offer on our home! It is contingent on the buyer's sale of their own home, which is pretty sketchy in the current housing market but it's still something, and they offered full asking price. Good selling juju over to our buyers, please and thank you.
That's all. I am unwell. But I won't be forever! You'll see! And now for some pictures from our week:
Step 1 complete: The kids and I are in Utah. I'm not sure I would say we "survived" the move to Utah, but we are definitely in Utah and the survival part is TBD. If last week we were salmon swimming upstream against the packing current, this week we have made it to our birth grounds and then proceeded to fall quite ill and abandon all energy/willpower. We now appear to be fish on the brinks of death, being carried back downstream. There's a glimmer of life left that will hopefully reignite sometime soon, but as of now, TBD.
The drive went pretty well. Some screaming and crying took place, but less than our last few Utah drives. I'm grateful that Alice can be entertained by shows and movies a little better now than when she was younger. This time I split the drive up and we stayed a night with my brother's family near Boise. The kids got to play with their cousins while I got to talk to Jordan and Amanda. Unfortunately the kids refused to fall asleep and things were pretty turbulent in the guest room until I threw the kids over my shoulder at 1:30 a.m., busted out to our car for my emergency stash of melatonin, and they finally gave in to the sleep around 2:30 a.m. The next day we played for a while and then drove to my parents' home in the afternoon/evening. I'm glad we got there when we did because Alice and I almost immediately came down with the worst colds of our life. I have never experienced sinus pressure like this. My head feels like it's going to actually explode from the pressure.
I'm so grateful my parents have provided us with a soft landing while I work to get our rental house move-in ready (without the assistance of any of our belongings, as our moving truck won't arrive for another 3+ weeks). This is the first time in over a decade when I've had the experience of staying with my parents and feeling zero desire to go see our favorite sights, eat our favorite Utah foods, do my favorite hikes. It's nice to know, "Hey, we're here for the long haul. It's ok to lie low and succumb to the sickness."
The dry climate has been rough to get used to (stuffy nose, cracked heels and lips and somehow ears), especially in combination with being sick. But it's an acceptable tradeoff to live close to family and all the other Utah things we've been looking forward to. It was magic to go trick-or-treating with my kids, alongside my siblings and their kids. Halloween was so fun and sweet, and it felt like I was in a nostalgic 90s movie of my own childhood. In that moment the sleepless nights felt worth it.
But alas, the sleepless nights continue. We are still very much right smack dab in the middle of a big move, and the kids are feeling uneasy, unsettled, unable to to fall asleep unless I'm laying right next to them. Because we moved a week before daylight savings, I decided to keep them on Washington time so it would be a more seamless transition. The downside was that last week, by the time I got the kids fully settled to sleep at night and was like, "Ok great, finally have time to text my landlord." "I can finally take a shower." "Let's register Jack for school." I'd realize it was 10:30 p.m. and Alice would likely be up multiple times in the night crying for me.
Jared has assured me that when he gets here in 3 weeks he is going to take over night duty and I should go catch a break. But, like, that's 3 weeks away and there are times when I genuinely question if my body will survive that long. There have been moments when I've questioned, in absolute seriousness, if I might actually die from stress and exhaustion. The kids are impossibly grumpy. And yet we persevere! I know I need to work on asking for and accepting help. There are loved ones here ready and willing to help if I can let go of the pride and, frankly, the habit of shouldering a much heavier load than I can carry on my own.
Oof, that was a big venting journal of a post. Thanks for letting me get that off my chest. Moving is hard. But also wonderful. And the logistical stress won't last forever! And now for some pics:
Last week I assured you that my next post would be from Utah. But then I remembered that on this Monday I would be driving from Boise to Utah, and likely have zero capacity to actually blog. So I am writing this the Friday before and scheduling it to go up on Monday. This week is tough. I've been continuing to pack up the house, while also packing me and the kids to live in Utah for a few weeks before the moving truck arrives, while also trying to keep our house looking perfect for showings at all times because it hasn't sold yet. Also trying to squeeze in quality family time visiting some favorite spots before we move and are apart from Jared for a month. If I chance trying to get something packed while Alice is awake, she will inevitably seize the opportunity to make a big mess that will then put me further behind than I was before. Really my only times to be productive are during her 90-minute nap, or after the kids are asleep for the night. Unfortunately, Jack's little brain is internalizing the move and doing what it did last time we moved, which is stew in the uncertainty and regress 3 years in the sleep department. He won't stay put in his bed after bedtime. He is scared and wants one of us with him until he falls asleep which can take quite a while. This all feels very much like trying to swim upstream against the current, only I'm not a salmon so I don't actually have the programming to swim upstream and it just all feels like a bit of a losing battle.
Jared also accidentally stopped taking his anxiety meds when we packed up our medicines 3 weeks ago, so I was doing a huge portion of everything alone and laaaaaate into the nights with a lot of bitterness until we realized, oh hey, Jared is sleeping all the time instead of helping because moving's a major life stressor and his anxiety meds are MIA. So we found those earlier this week and it finally feels like I'm not alone in this move again. I'm so relieved to have my partner and friend back instead of Sleepy Moaning Myrtle who would withdraw and call me a "mean person" when I begged for help (that was the point when I frantically started racking my brain for where my husband could have disappeared to). As soon as we realized about the medicine we were like, "Ohhhhhhhh yup. This tracks." Thank u modern meds.
I cling to the same mindset I used to when I felt overwhelmed during finals weeks in college, and here is the mindset: A week from now, this hard part will be over no matter what. I will be in Utah with the kids. I will somehow have gotten through the packing while keeping our house immaculate, and the driving with screaming kids and all of it. The only way out is through, and somehow I will stumble through the packing and moving and driving 15 hours with two young kids and come out on the other side, and then I won't have to do this particular part anymore. (I will however have to unpack the moving truck and set up our rental home without Jared in a few weeks, and then do the whole moving thing again in another year, but that won't be to a different state and we're not worrying about it right now.)
Anyway, things are good. We did have one home showing last week, and the family who looked at our home really loved it. We should find out this weekend if they're going to make an offer or not. That's about all I've got to write now. I've got to call Jack's school now and request a withdrawal form so I can start the process of getting him registered for school in Utah. We're doing it!
I can feel a little tingling in my bones whispering, "It's time. It's time." It's time to move! This feels different than any of our other moves in the past. It feels like this time we are moving to an expansive support system of loved ones and old friends and cousins for our kids. To family dinners and family holidays. Lunch dates with my Grandma. Playdates with my high school bestie. Parks galore. Great schools for our kids. The potential to drop my kids off to play with grandma and grandpa or cousins if I am drowning or in an emergency. (I have never had this support before and I hope my parents aren't too burned out from helping out with all the other grandkids for the past several years! We are so grateful we've had Jared's parents in Washington as a great starter support system. Living an hour away from them has been great for support when we can plan ahead a bit. Tougher when we need help on the fly or for just an hour or two.)
The kids and I were originally planning to drive to Utah yesterday so we could be away from the stress of home showings. But fortunately/unfortunately, we have had exactly ZERO home showings since our home was listed nearly two weeks ago. Yikes. The silver lining is that we aren't being kicked out at a moment's notice with the requirement of leaving a perfectly undisturbed home behind. Because of this, we decided to stay one more week. One more football game for Jack, one more week to help with the packing, one more week for Jack to enjoy his classmates and school teacher he's really loved. We might even make it to the ward cabin-or-treat at Cascade Park this weekend before we move.
There have been two weekends of open houses for our home, during which time we've received a small smattering of curious lookie-loos. Only one seemed to be a "serious" buyer. He and his wife loved our house (they are big fans of the corner lot and our fireplace built-ins) but unfortunately their employer is Boeing, and if you know anything about the goings-on with Boeing these days, you know it's probably not the most secure time to be buying a home if you work for them. So. That buyer is loosely on the radar and that's about it. We may have to drop our home price at some point, but it'll be ok. We've got a little wiggle room.
I am so excited to find out what life in Utah is going to look like on the other side of this move. This move has felt really stressful for a long time, but now we are so close to the other side and we are excited. Jack is excited. Jared is excited. Alice would probably be excited if she could understand. As it is, we might have a rough Alice transition ahead of us, but nothing we can't handle (famous last words). Ok then, till next week, when I'll be posting live from Utah!
Here are some pictures, starting with our trip just across the border into Canada to the most adorable town called White Rock. Jack's top request of what he wanted to do before we moved was visit Canada. On the drive up we realized that we would be there on Canadian Thanksgiving! Luckily the ice cream shops and pier were still open.
We had the open house for our home over the weekend after it officially went on the market and . . . crickets. Only two people showed up. Our house is really cute, but it might sit for a few weeks because we are selling in an off market in the off season in an off area (our school district is the worst in the region so most people look a little further south). We aren't too worried; several other homes with our same floor plan in our area have gone on the market in the past few months. They have all sold, but it takes about a month. So we will keep things looking nice, and I will start packing up me and the kids to move to Utah in the next few weeks. The moving truck arrives November 1, so that is the latest we would be here. Here is the link to our home on Zillow if you want to see what our home looks like inside:
https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/9812-Hawkins-Ave-Granite-Falls-WA-98252/440172664_zpid/
While the open house was taking place, the kids had a sleepover at Jared's parents' home and we went on a short 2-night cruise to Canada. One of our favorite memories since moving here was our Alaska cruise three years ago. We've always said we need to do another cruise before we move out of Washington, because it's so nice to be able to just drive down to the cruise terminal and hop on a boat. With Alice being young we've been on the lookout for short cruises, and we recently saw this 2-night cruise to Vancouver for really cheap. We figured this would be a nice bookend to our time in Washington, an opportunity to rest in the midst of moving chaos, a way to be out of the house for a few days while it sells, and a way for Jared and I to reconnect, because moving can be a tense time. It proved to be a great idea, and it checked all those boxes. We had a wonderful time. We did lots of resting and eating, spent a full day at sea, and finished up with a day exploring Vancouver together. I took some pictures on my nice camera, but I'm having trouble getting the memory card to connect to my computer, so for now I'll just share the pictures we took on our phones:
