Gratitude Journal

I'm grateful for jobs.

I'm grateful for full-time jobs.

I'm grateful for full-time jobs that count as a hundred or so volunteer hours.

I'm grateful for full-time jobs that count as a hundred or so volunteer hours and still pay for a nice chunkity chunk of my education.

I'm grateful for full-time jobs that count as a hundred or so volunteer hours and still pay for a nice chunkity chunk of my education and provide me with an hour of commuting time to sleep do my math homework.

I'm grateful for full-time jobs that count as a hundred or so volunteer hours and still pay for a nice chunkity chunk of my education and provide me with an hour of commuting time to do my math homework and allow me to go on walks with my dad during lunch.

I'm grateful for full-time jobs that count as a hundred or so volunteer hours and still pay for a nice chunkity chunk of my education and provide me with an hour of commuting time to do my math homework and allow me to go on walks with my dad during lunch and where my coworkers pronounce my name right (Law-Ruh, not Low-Ruh. Law. Powerhouse. (Abdomen?) Laura. Remember that.)

I'm grateful for full-time jobs that count as a hundred or so volunteer hours and still pay for a nice chunkity chunk of my education and provide me with an hour of commuting time to do my math homework and allow me to go on walks with my dad during lunch and where my coworkers pronounce my name right and that goes along nicely with my math major.

I'm grateful for attractive men and gingersnaps and my long luscious locks and freckles and those days when I'm not sick and carbohydrates when I'm allowed to eat them and my screeching pig and my screeching dog and my Men of Hawaii calendar and chocolate protein powder and drugs and scented candle dates with my little brother and scented candles and my little brother and tabs. Just making sure you're still paying attention.

I'm grateful for full-time jobs that count as a hundred or so volunteer hours and still pay for a nice chunkity chunk of my education and provide me with an hour of commuting time to do my math homework and allow me to go on walks with my dad during lunch and where my coworkers pronounce my name right and that goes along nicely with my math major and where they let me address envelopes for 8 hours straight on my first day.

I'm grateful for full-time jobs that count as a hundred or so volunteer hours and still pay for a nice chunkity chunk of my education and provide me with an hour of commuting time to do my math homework and allow me to go on walks with my dad during lunch and where my coworkers pronounce my name right and that goes along nicely with my math major and where they let me address envelopes for 8 hours straight on my first day and Mary and Pippin work in the tech room while everyone else has at least a Master's except for me.

I'm grateful for full-time jobs that count as a hundred or so volunteer hours and still pay for a nice chunkity chunk of my education and provide me with an hour of commuting time to do my math homework and allow me to go on walks with my dad during lunch and where my coworkers pronounce my name right and that goes along nicely with my math major and where they let me address envelopes for 8 hours straight on my first day and Mary and Pippin work in the tech room while everyone else has at least a Master's except for me and where my dad can bring me a fanchy shandwich and treats and it isn't a call center.

I'm grateful for full-time jobs that count as a hundred or so volunteer hours and still pay for a nice chunkity chunk of my education and provide me with an hour of commuting time to do my math homework and allow me to go on walks with my dad during lunch and where my coworkers pronounce my name right and that goes along nicely with my math major and where they let me address envelopes for 8 hours straight on my first day and Mary and Pippin work in the tech room while everyone else has at least a Master's except for me and where my dad can bring me a fanchy shandwich and treats and isn't a call center, and for timing because this job and that job wouldn't have been nearly is valuable as the one with all the above listed benefits to drive me insane with gratitude and YOU insane with Shootmeintheheadiosis.

I'm grateful this post is over.


You're grateful I used coloring so you didn't have to read the whole thing. Lazies.




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For Steph's Mom:

You never actually entered the minesweeper competition, but Steph told me your score and I found it so impressive that I tried all week to beat it. I got down to 50, but didn't even begin to approach the 30s. Thus, I dedicate this verse to you:

Steph's Mom is a champ.
She could own a minesweeping camp.
She's better than Laura
Who needs to raise the bar-a.
I lost so bad my namesake feels damp.

(p.s. Those of you who don't personally know me will be lost real fast if you don't pick up now on the fact that my last name is an underwear company. I work it.)

3 comments

  1. Nice. I fanchy fanchy sandwiches, too.

    And if I recall correctly (and I do), I believe you owe Steph's Mom two verses of a limerick.

    Or perhaps you were just keeping us in suspense for the next verse?

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  3. You're right, I AM grateful for the coloring. And for YouTube for helping me understand the significance of fanchy shandwiches and eye-sh cream trucksh playing "We Three Kingzh of Orientarrr."

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